Post by LATAGAW on Aug 31, 2005 11:34:21 GMT 8
[glow=red,2,300]Children's Vision...
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom
to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet.
So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.
Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to
my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held
it up and said with a charming little smile, "We
better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in
the toilet a few days ago.
KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out
of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she
asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.
"It's the minister, Mommy," the child said to her
mother. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone
to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm
summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead
of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I
was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old
shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't
wearing a seat belt!
MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in
the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room
burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and
running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement
and then asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever
seen a little boy before?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers
lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my
4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The
various appliances of old age, particularly the canes,
walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her.
One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth
soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the
inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and
whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a
party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she
warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And
why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you
a headache the next morning."
SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of
school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her
mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't
let me talk!" [/glow] ;D
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom
to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet.
So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.
Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to
my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held
it up and said with a charming little smile, "We
better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in
the toilet a few days ago.
KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out
of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she
asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.
"It's the minister, Mommy," the child said to her
mother. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone
to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm
summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead
of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I
was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old
shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't
wearing a seat belt!
MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in
the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room
burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and
running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement
and then asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever
seen a little boy before?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers
lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my
4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The
various appliances of old age, particularly the canes,
walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her.
One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth
soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the
inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and
whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a
party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she
warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And
why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you
a headache the next morning."
SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of
school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her
mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't
let me talk!" [/glow] ;D